🏆 We won!

Tips on how to take home the gold

This week brands took to the gram and your inbox to win over your heart with their cleverness or, according to the Low Stake Conspiracy Theory thread on Reddit, to test out their wild ideas. At Coalition, we take April Fools very seriously, participating in the contest for the best joke every ear. The contest is sponsored by us, it’s judged by us, and we win every single year, obvs. If that seems rude, please just let me have one nice thing this week.

A ski that makes every day feel like spring skiing. Because ICE sucks. Nothing ruins a day on the slopes like hitting a patch of masked ice. That’s why our newest ski featuring NoNatzi technology is designed to resist it.

Our community understood the assignment, with a lovely soul emailing me this in response to our announcement:

“I was fortunate enough to be able to purchase one of the first pairs of the F*ck Ice skis, and I must say that they performed beyond my expectations. I live on the East Coast where all of us are plagued by Ice. It does sneak up on you! And who likes to ski downhill, looking in all directions for the dreaded Ice? But with NoNatzi Technology, my F*ck Ice skis slice up the most oppressive boilerplate, and I can make my descent undaunted. Thank you, Coalition Snow!” — A Satisfied Customer.

—> THE SKI WAS FAKE BUT I MADE REAL F*CK ICE HOODIES

Other brands tried to compete, receiving an honorable mention from our team of judges (that’s me, I’m the team):

• Unofficial Networks announced Vail Resorts would ban the sale of alcohol. Anyone who fucks with Vail is a winner in our book.

• TREW Gear leveraged the industry’s obsession with BOA, designing a pair of bibs you could fine-tune. The butt BOA and his smile were the cherry on top.

• Understatement mocked Zuck’s sexist censorship rules. We love a brand after our own heart.

What did you see this week that made you snort? Laughing is fine too.

You might be wondering—or not—what goes into crafting a winning April Fools joke.

We first dipped our toes in the proverbial April Fools water in 2017 when we designed a men’s ski: “Rather than working with men to design the skis and boards that they wanted, we went ahead and designed gear strictly based on our understanding of stereotypical male qualities,” said Coalition Snow CEO Jen Gurecki. “It was actually pretty easy because all men like the same things, right?”

• Tip: Poke fun at your competitors or industry by doing what they do, but flip it.

In 2019, we announced the sale of Coalition to Broman LLC, which ended up in a trade publication because the author couldn’t read through the lines: As Animan looks into the future, he says that Broman’s next target acquisition will be companies owned by people of color. “They really are the next big thing in the industry.”

• Tip: Take notes on the cringeworthy, stereotypical things people say and do.

We were to open a women’s only ski resort in 2021, which made people sad when they found out it wasn’t true: “Typically ski resorts are a simmering vat of dude soup, but we saw the opportunity to create a mountain that catered to women and gender non-conforming humans. The folks at the Majella group get to live in America, and we get a resort that’s free from the testosterone-fueled bro scene that dominates the ski industry. Everyone wins… except men,” said Coalition Snow CEO Jen Gurecki.

• Tip: Create something people want and be brutally honest about why they want it.

In 2023, we introduced Shop & Slay, a personal shopping service designed to help women navigate the dude soup: “For just $69.69 we will accompany you to your local gear shop to not only wade through the bullshit, but provide comedic relief to the typical interactions that normally encourage heavy day drinking and screaming into pillows.”

• Tip: Make people feel seen.

Last year we double-got people, sending out an “internal only email” that included “draft” versions of next season’s top sheets. The purity police tried to come for us, and we lost a few subscribers, but I think it was one of our best April Fools yet.

• Tip: Create tension.

My older self is going to thank my younger self for doing this.

All joking aside, I’m really proud of this year’s April Fools joke. I wanted to speak to the absolutely idiotic, chaotic, and quite frankly heartbreaking hellscape we find ourselves living in while also making people laugh. It’s all quite grim and we need to find ways to bring joy to our activism. It’s also quite fun to practice writing subversively, which feels like a necessary skill in the year 2025. I hope that I was able to convey that what we’re being called to do—standing up and speaking out—can be that kinda good trouble that you want to get in.

Until next time…

Jen Gurecki, she/her, CEO of Coalition Snow

PS: Happy Trans Day of Visibility

coalitionsnow

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🪧 April 5th, Hands Off Protest: I’ll be in Carson City, but there’s likely an event near you. I’m particularly excited about this protest because so many organizations have come together to organize it. It might be the biggest protest we’ve seen yet. Register here and if you want to hang out with me, DM or email me your number and I’ll add you to the group text.

⛷️ April 9th, Free Demos + Gathering at Winter Park: If I’m driving all the way to Colorado for Boot Tan Fest I figured I would make the most of it and ski one of my favorite resorts! Get all of the details and register here.

🏂 April 11th, Free Demos at Boot Tan Fest: We'll be getting naked, turning screws, and having the time of our life, not necessarily in that order. RSVP for demos here.

🎿 April 13th & 14th, Free Demos + Gathering in Salt Lake City: SLC, I’m headed your way on the drive back from Boot Tan Fest! Get all of the details and RSVP here.

🏔️ April 23-27th, Bachelorette: Because skiing at Mt. Bachelor in the spring is glorious and so is the company. There's ONE SPOT LEFT, so if you want to join, get your buns in gear and respond to this email.

🚵‍♀️ May 24th, Ladies of the Loam: Yay bikes! I’ll be popping up at the very first all-women's mountain bike enduro and festival in California + offering free simple bike repairs. Get the details here.

💌 May, Full Send: Join me in this collaborative workspace to grow and nurture your emails, newsletters, and creative writing because the algorithm isn’t there for you to succeed. Join the waitlist here.

🚲 July, Cycling Safari in Kenya with Zawadisha: Please tell me what is more fun in summer than cycling next to giraffes and elephants. If you want to learn more, respond to this message or DM me. This is THE trip to save for. ⁠

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Thanks for reading! All typos are intentional to make sure you’re paying attention.

Did you know? Coalition is so much more than a ski and snowboard brand. We are a team of creatives and dreamers who love to get our hands dirty.

If you love what we put into this world and want to infuse the same energy, joy, and je ne sais quoi into your business, consider working with us as a sponsor or a collaborator on your newsletter, creative content, or event. DM us for details.

Other places to find us:

Website: www.coalitionsnow.com

IG: @coalitionsnow